Adultery is sexual intercourse between a married person and someone other than the spouse. In Virginia, sodomy is a ground for divorce, as well as buggery (anal intercourse). A divorce will not be granted if it occurred more than five years before the institution of the suit, or if it was committed by the connivance of the party alleging the act.
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There probably is no such thing as a pleasant adultery case; because names, dates, places, paramours, and the like have to be brought out in the open. If your spouse no longer cares about what you know and is open about the affair, you're lucky. You can then catch your spouse flagrante delicto, which means you have your spouse in the flagrant wrong and may not have to worry about hiring detectives. However, you may still need a detective to prove your case in court. There is still a need for a corroborative witness, such as a mutual friend or neighbor, who has no stake in the matter except telling the court what he (she) witnessed. Most adultery cases are proven by circumstantial evidence, which means that you have to establish that your spouse had the disposition and opportunity to commit adultery. To establish adultery, there must be clear, positive, and convincing evidence.
Public displays of affection, such as hand-holding, kissing, and hugging, between the guilty spouse and the paramour are generally sufficient evidence to indicate an adulterous disposition. Opportunity may be proven by showing that your spouse was seen entering the paramour's apartment at 11 P.M. and not coming out until 8 A.M. the following morning and that they were alone. If you can only prove disposition but not opportunity, the courts may not allow your divorce because the court may reason that it is just mere speculation. The same is true if you only show that there was opportunity, but cannot prove disposition. When you think about it, this seems to make sense. Evidence must be more than strongly suspicious. Post-separation adultery may also be the basis for the deserting party to obtain a divorce based upon adultery.
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Adulterers are not equal under the blanket of the law. In Virginia, adultery may impact custody if the adultery is proven to have harmed or impaired the children. Adultery does not necessarily affect alimony awards in Virginia. It will, however, be a factor for consideration in awarding alimony.
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